By Amber Lee Williams
Can you think of a time when someone in a meeting joked about another group of people, evoking laughter from everyone else in the room? Or have you worked on a team in which the men always seemed to get better projects than the women?
The big question is: Did you speak up?
It takes courage to call out inappropriate behavior. But you have the power to manage how, when and to whom you raise concerns that will encourage positive change.
- Choose your audience carefully. If the person making an offensive joke is a peer or subordinate, it can be effective to address the issue with him directly—but respectfully and privately. However, if the person is a superior, it may be more prudent to consult an ally in your organization who can either identify the right person to help, or raise the issue on your behalf.
- Keep a cool head. It’s worth stepping back, working through your emotions and taking the time to plan what you want to communicate to ensure that your message isn’t undermined by your delivery.
- Create an opportunity for dialogue. The goal is to change the dynamic, so model the behavior you want to see. For instance, instead of calling someone sexist for giving the plum assignments to the men on the team, mention a qualified female colleague as a candidate. If the supervisor questions that colleague’s qualifications, point out how participating on the team could further develop her skills, and offer to mentor her.
For the colleague who makes off-color jokes, you might privately tell him that his comments make you uncomfortable. You can say that you don’t think it’s appropriate to make jokes at the expense of other groups and that the behavior is offensive and distracting.
Be willing to listen to the other person’s side even if you don’t agree. Listening to others’ perspectives is essential for creating an environment where all voices are heard and respected.
Amber Lee Williams is senior associate general counsel of US Compliance for Wal-Mart Stores Inc.