It’s official. Rainy days are here again. Well it’s Pagasa-official, so it can be unofficially official. Or officially unofficial. I’m officially confused.
While others feel depressed with rainy days and Mondays, I actually like the wet season. Ika nga ni Shirley Manson, I’m only happy when it rains. I’d rather have a cloudy day than a super-hot, scorching one. Rain for me signifies life. And the start of new beginnings. Rain supposedly washes away past sorrows and heartaches.
Well, that’s what Angelica Panganiban must be wishing for, as well.
In an almost tell-all interview with Vice Ganda on ABS-CBN’s Gandang Gabi Vice, the actress confessed that she is still not over her ex-beau, John Lloyd Cruz. She first avoided places where they used to go to, but it was hard, as they spent so much time traveling as a couple, so almost every place has a special memory in Angelica’s mind. And then she was convinced by her friends to fly to Hong Kong over the Holy Week to help her forget; little did she know that John Lloyd was also spending time there.
According to Angelica, there’d been times she would go over the events in the relationship in her head and then quickly realize how pathetic she was. “Girl, kawawa ka naman! Bangon!” she would tell herself. Angelica was so candid in the interview, even confessing she would still wait for John Lloyd’s text—and that she’d deliberately not reply right away when he does, so that she would not seem too eager.
She was also honest in saying that they would still get together once in awhile. She even admitted to texting John Lloyd, “Ang sakit sakit naman nito…. Tama ba desisyon natin?”
Most important, Angelica revealed that “’di pa ako nakaka-move on. Hayaan mo na. Konti na lang. Kaya ko, kaya ko.”
And I believe her. Kayang-kaya nga niya bumangon. Angelica is a strong woman. She may always wear her heart on her sleeve, which many people think is her weakness, but on the contrary, only strong people can truly express their feelings openly and willingly.
I don’t know what prompted Angelica to do this interview and be so open about her feelings. She wasn’t promoting anything, as she is in between projects. My friends say it must’ve been cathartic for her, as she obviously has a lot on her chest that she wanted to unload.
“And being a child of show business, the best way for her was in a TV interview. That’s what she is used to. ’Yan ang kinalakihan niya,” said a friend who I will simply call Margarita Singco-Freud.
Well, what Margarita said may be true. Angelica did this interview for herself, but in doing so, she helped a lot of people going through the same thing. That someone as gorgeous as Angelica can feel so helpless when it comes to love.
That she’s like everybody else who just breaks down and cry at the memory of a former love. That it is so hard to move on, especially when you’re still in love with that person. That someone as gorgeous as her can experience unrequited love and swallow all her pride for the man she loves. That a famous celebrity like Angelica can fall victim to love, just like any other ordinary human being.
I’m very sure after the interview, many people loved Angelica Panganiban even more because she showed them it is OK to fall in love and give everything to the relationship.
One of the questions Angelica answered in the interview was about second chances. “Hangga’t may nararamdaman ka, hangga’t may hope, may chance,” she answered. Obviously she was talking about the possibility of coming back together with John Lloyd. She didn’t know her statement went straight to my heart and made me think about my love and my life.
I’m glad Angelica Panganiban has given me the hope and helped me accept the reality that it is hard to move on from a failed relationship—and that we are not alone in this.