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BEGINNING tomorrow, December 1, we have exactly 23 days
to get our Christmas lists in order, subtracting the
friends we haven’t seen for ages or adding new ones to
the list (including new bosses for the proverbial sipsip
gifts), and getting all our shopping done before the
clock strikes midnight to herald the Christ Lord’s
birth.
I’m
almost done, having eliminated most of my lovable and
understanding friends from my list and pleading poverty
again this year, but I still need to get in order the
gifts for the godchildren (with a plus-one courtesy of
Iris this year).
After
having had a less-than-productive shopping expedition
with Fil at the International Bazaar at the PICC, I’m
looking forward to a three-day shopping extravaganza at
the St. James Bazaar in Alabang beginning today.
Hopefully by this Sunday, I would be all done with my
gift-buying, allowing me to concentrate on my own needs
next. After all, I’ve toiled, sweated and run around
godknowswhere, just to earn honest decent wages from my
writing, so it’s time I get some rewards in return.
And I do
have a lot of dream gifts for this Christmas, not that I
can afford them all. But perhaps I can take a cue from
the wildly popular video/book The Secret and focus all
my positive thoughts and energies on these gifts. I
shall visualize receiving these wonderful goodies and,
for sure, most of them will be handed to me
effortlessly. And, nah, I’m not going to wish for any of
that “peace and goodwill to all men” crap that everyone
unabashedly says when the klieg lights and cameras are
switched on in their direction. I’m all pure materialism
this year.
My 10
dream gifts this Christmas are:
1. A
10-day free stay in all the best spas in the world, with
complimentary massages, body treatments and yoga
instruction. These should include Reethi Rah in the
Maldives, Banyan Tree in Phuket, the Ananda in the
Himalayas and, just for kicks, the Four Seasons Biltmore
Resort in
Santa Barbara,
just because Vanity Fair columnist Christopher Hitchens
stayed there and tried to get an extreme makeover.
2. A
monthlong cooking, eating and drinking tour of Tuscany,
Italy, preferably, of course, with some gorgeous
hunka-hunka burning love I’ll probably meet over there.
Who knows, I’ll probably move there permanently. Think
Diane Lane in Under the Tuscan Sun, right
Francine?
3. The
freakin’ P3.2-million, 103-inch Panasonic plasma TV
everyone’s been talking about. While I have no room in
my mother’s townhouse to put it in, I can probably have
it installed in the garage and watch all first-rate,
still-to-be shown-in-local-theaters movies on DVD. Of
course, I will have to charge my neighbors P200 each if
they want watch the movies with me. That P3.2 million
will be paid up for in no time. Uh-huh, I’m so smart,
aren’t I? Don’t you wish we were friends?
4.
Full-course lunch or dinner at French Laundry with
chef-turned-TV host/book author Anthony Bourdain. I saw
a long-ago episode of Bourdain’s TV show where he and
his chef buddies dined at what has been called one of
the best restaurants in the world, and everyone looked
like they were having fun with the tasting menu alone
and the wine just flowing. This time, I’ll do the eating
and Bourdain will provide the laughs (along with the
credit card to pay the bill). We will have fun roasting
that perennially perky fake cook Rachel Ray! Ooof! What
the hell was Oprah thinking?
5.
Majority ownership in at least one hugely profitable
listed firm, like SM Investments, PLDT (yeah, even if
Smart Communications is ever so slow to release my new
phone under my retention policy) or Globe
Telecommunications (just to get back at Smart), JG
Summit Holdings and Metrobank. There are other companies
that are attractive but I’m still too busy plotting the
takeover of the other firms. Besides, I don’t want to
appear too greedy…duh.
6. My
own vineyard and winery in New Zealand, which produces
some of the most exciting wines in the world these days.
I had the good fortune of touring the Villa Maria Estate
years before NZ wines were introduced in the local
market and marveled at the modern processes used to
produce its award-winning wines (large steel barrels in
place of oak, and screwcaps instead of corks). I shall
become the best world producer of award-winning Pinot
Noirs, Shiraz and Sauvignon Blancs.
7. The
Jodie Ankle Boot from Louis Vuitton, which, I swear, is
the most fabulous ankle boot ever! Made of canvas and
calf leather, the brown boot just looks
oh-so-comfortable even with its four-inch heel. I like
it also because the LV monogram detail is subtle, unlike
the ones on those fake
LV bags available at your friendly tindera in the
Greenhills tiangges. I especially love the metal rivets
and tiny buckle detail. I stumbled on the Jodie after
dreaming about a pair of
LV
boots, which set me off googling photos of
LV boots one entire day.
8. The
untitled 1954 oil on canvas by HR Ocampo displayed in
the function room of the Bank of the Philippine Islands
named after the artist. Or perhaps Pablo Amorsolo’s
portraits of the Women of Rizal hanging in the BPI
chairman’s office? Yes, some art for Christmas may be
good for the soul, and will undoubtedly also raise one’s
market value in the eyes of envious friends. And you all
thought I was shallow!
9. A
house in the Southhamptons or maybe in Lake Como in
Italy where all my friends and I can play all day.
There’s nothing like exchanging gossip over cocktails
with Vera Wang, Renée Zellwegger, and George Soros at
the Hamptons abode, or having dinner with gorgeous
George Clooney and his Ocean 12 buddies at my lakeside
retreat. Of course, my friends will have to pay for
their own airfare and land transport to get there.
Sorry, darlings, no such thing as a free lunch!
And last
but not the least:
10. Tony
Leung. Need I explain? |
